I want to be a dreamer

Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world.
— harriet tubman

 I've spent the last two hours watching the Republican debate with my sons. It has been equal parts entertaining ( thanks to the theatrics from one son ) and frustrating and sad. 

As inspired as I am when I hear Bernie Sanders speak, I am as terrified when I hear any of these candidates speak. I couldn't even make it through the entire debate. I feel icky from all of the fear mongering. 

There was a time that I could ignore politics. I could place trust in a god who held the world in his hands. I didn't have to worry about who was in the White House, who was representing my state, I could simply say that god was in control. 

Now, I have to trust in a system that I fear is broken. I have to trust in a people to reason and not be swayed by cries of gloom and doom. It's not very encouraging. See, this is what happens when I listen to their version of the world. I become the cynic. 

This is not the world that I want to live in. This is not the world that I want to believe in. I want to believe that a better world is possible. I don't want to be a cynic. I don't even know that I want to be a realist. I want to be a dreamer. 

This is a radical statement coming from one who claims she forgot how to dream long ago. What other choice do I have? I cannot NOT believe. I cannot give in to the hopeless rhetoric that I just witnessed spewed. I have to believe and I have to dream of something different. 

A dream is just that unless someone does the work toward bringing it to life, to the here and now. There is work to be done, much work to be done. Still, It begins with the little things. It begins with me and how I choose to be in the world. 

I believe in a world built upon trust, authenticity, and freedom. I believe that doing business with each other can be an honorable transaction built on mutual respect and offering. I believe that I don't have to scream and shout and offer gimmicks in order to for my art to sale. I am not reaching for more, more, more. 

I believe in a world where all people are equally valued, where love wins. I believe that doing the right thing is enough motivation to do the right thing. No one should be trying to score points. 

I am sure there is so much more that I believe in but I am also sure that I am tired. It's been a long, good day. Guess what? I finally finished cutting all that grass! I think I will go to bed now and wish for the dreams.